Sunday, September 19, 2010

Day 3

Hi everyone, first of all I need to apologize bc I will not be posting any pictures tonight.  This is bc the camera is in the room (who know where) and if I have to go search for it AND  the &%^%$^ cable that constantly seems to dissappear,  I would probably convince myself to go straight to bed, so instead I am going to stay right here, blog for a bit and then go get some much needed sleep. 
What can I say about the past 2 days?  They have been filled with great moments and difficult ones.  The kids are getting along, Oli tries to help but sometimes her "helping" makes things harder.  Fortunately they are both good sleepers and the nonstop pooping has subsided (thanks to a home visit by a Dr and some medicine).  Giancarlo is a happy little boy but he has had a few tantrums and those have been trying.  We dont know what can set him off,  sometimes its something silly like being told not to do something but he winds up on the floor screaming and crying for up to half an hour.  He had his worse one today, he kicks, cries and screams and gets all stiff and does not want to be held or touched.  I just sit near him and let him get it all out and ask him if he is ready for me to help him every few minutes and eventually he says yes and holds out his little arms and then he just lays his head on my shoulder and puts his arms around my neck.  It just breaks my heart, knowing he has had so many changes in his short life, knowing he feels lost and confused and cannot express how he feels. I just hold him for a long time and keep telling him everything will be fine that we love his so much and that we will always be there for him.
 I am being flexible with him in many ways, for instance he insisted on bringing a piece of toast into the room after dinner tonight and I said he could.  He then proceeded to hold on to the toast for dear life and even wanted to take in to the shower. I convinced him to leave it on his bed, thinking he would forget about it but the first thing he said when we got back was "pan?".  I gave it back to him and we proceeded to read 3 books with crumbs falling everywhere between us.  He then wanted to sleep with it but agreed to let me put it on a shelf as long as he could have it in the morning.  So there is sits  . . . a piece of cold, smushed toast right next to his favorite car.  I know we need to establish trust and if that happens by having a few crumbs in bed or by having that toast sitting there that, so be it!
Tomorrow we have our meeting wih the Defender of Minors and them we are off to Medellin for almost 2 weeks of R & R (however much R & R you can get with 2 young kids).  SO looking forward to  it!


Sandy said...

Zita, you are an AMAZING mommy! I think you handled "el pan" perfectly! I am so thankful God brought you, Anthony and Oli into Giancarlo's life... establishing boundaries is so hard but you're right... trust is so important at this stage. Know we love you guys and are praying for your journey... can't wait to see what you think of Medellin! big kisses!

Maru Jarmillo said...

have a great meeting. hope you all get to relax and enjoy Medellin and your time in Colombia. besos, maria

Anonymous said...

Zita, You and Anthony are wonderful parents and are very well educated in adoption and the needs of kids at various stages and in different situations. Take it one day at a time and know that Giancarlo and Oli know that you love them. Hope your meeting goes well, and that you have a great time in Medellin. Huge hugs! Deborah

Anonymous said...

Just reading your thoughts makes you think of so many choices you made with your own children at pivotal times in their lives. You can only try to do the right thing - you cannot always do it! Seems - that so far - you're doing amazingly well. We're just proud to even be a small part of this wonderful world called the DeVita family!